This letter is for YOU.
The you that had rough week. Shit maybe it’s just been a rough year. The you that seems to be under a constant storm. The you that sometimes gets super dark and hopeless. The you that feels ashamed and embarrassed that a woman of your caliber would be where you are. The you that is hanging by a string, and sometimes doesn’t know how much longer you can hold on. The you that wishes for an old life. The you that blames yourself for everything that goes wrong. To YOU.
You are incredible. You make this world a little bit more wonderful. You are valued. You are stronger than you recognize yourself to be. You have so much potential and so many things left to do. You have time. You maybe be hurting, struggling, and feeling angry because things did not turn our the way you had hoped; but you’re not alone.
I am You.
Over the last week, I met with several new clients in the midsts of their greatest challenge. All in a dark place. All of which are feeling hopeless.
In each session, I was reminded of how much we can handle, how much we take on, and how much we keep climbing even when we are completely exhausted…because we have to. And, because we are so tired, forget to acknowledge how much we’ve taken on or give credit to how far we’ve already come.
These seasons of shit storms we face, last as long as they need to. It’s not fair, it’s not easy, and I doubt any of us have asked for them to happen. I get it. I have been angry, I have gone dark, I have felt hopeless…at times I still get hung up.
I am grateful for my season of hardships, obstacles, and dark times because it has softened me. It opened me to truly understand and walk along side the suffering of my clients on a whole new level.
Divorce, grief/loss, dealing with pain or physical aliments, an overall lack of happiness or fulfillment; the question is not “why is this happening to me?” but rather “why is this happening for me?”
This isn’t an easy or comfortable spot to sit. Believe me, I know. However, there are some small things you can do to at least keep yourself moving through it, rather than feeling stuck. Because before any breakthrough we must have a breakdown.
- Commit to investing in the highest version of you. This means you must work on yourself, invest in yourself. Seek out a mentor, a counselor, a coach, your pastor/priest; someone that is going to support and challenge you, provide insight and suggestions where you may not be able to see. This is a must!
- Have a morning routine that gets your focus going in a forward direction. We have 30-50k thoughts a day. If you can train your brain to focus on what’s most important, you are setting a course for what your brain need to focus on for the future. This will conserve so much emotional energy.
- Find an outlet. For me it’s my dogs and being physically active. What gives you an emotional release?
- Call a friend. Never do it all on your own. We develop our circle in times of need; and those that love you will support you no matter what. They give you the light, when you don’t see any. Keep them closest during these times.
- Increase your self care: choosing healthier foods, making sure you eat, doing something active, making sure you’re getting good sleep, drinking enough water, resting…these are the first things out the door when we hit. Don’t give up on yourself.
- Ask yourself these questions:
- How do I attack this?
- What is my learning lesson or what can I take from this experience?
- Who am I creating myself to be?
I am a flawed professional, a human being at the most basic level. But, I also think that has given me a more compassionate and empathetic edge. When I say I get it….I truly do. May this week you find that giving yourself a little more love is truly the best gift you can give, especially when you are feeling like shit! 🙂